Monday, May 1, 2017

Pressure.

I'm not very good at introductions. A lot of times I sit here for minutes on end starting to type and then retracting, because I can't think of the "best way" to get started. So I'm going to just dive right in to what's on my mind.
Tonight I'm thinking about pressures we as human beings have put on us every day. Pressure we put on ourselves, and pressures that come from our peers, our parents, our bosses, our significant others, our kids (or pets who are like our kids). That's A LOT of pressures  for any person to handle on a daily basis isn't it?! I feel like we live in a world where a majority of our time is responding to these pressures and figuring out how to tolerate, fulfill, or overcome them. (Side note that while I'm typing this right now, a favorite song of mine called "Pressure" just came on. No joke!)
Let's start with the pressure we put on ourselves for example. For me this is probably one of the heaviest weighing pressures. Just yesterday, I got myself all in a funk because I made myself a to do list and I wasn't able to cross off a few things on there. I've always been a list person. It helps me organize all the thoughts swarming around in my crazy brain. Without lists, reminders, or my calendar, I highly doubt I would make it to half the obligations in my life. Anyways, yesterday was Sunday but it wasn't just a typical Sunday. I had spent the Thursday night through Saturday night prior in Las Vegas, pretty much going non-stop, as you typically do in Vegas, and I had a blast. No regrets there. But here I was with a free day and many things I would have liked to accomplish before heading into the work week-- and just not enough motivation to do them. In retrospect, I'm sure I needed the rest. Pretty much any amount time in Vegas (or any big city) requires recovery time; ESPECIALLY as the years go by and my ability to bounce back from partying gets less and less. For whatever reason though, I wasn't cutting myself that slack.  And I found myself in a really irritable mood and wondering why. I was even getting short with my mom on the phone and feeling really bad for being like that.
One of the things on my list I wanted to check off was writing a blog post in fact. Some psychoanalytical part of me wanted to keep on track with a cadence of posting regularly, but the there just wasn't much coming to mind for me to write about. Writer's block of some sort? Maybe. I forewarned my husband of how I was feeling, so my mood wouldn't be misinterpreted and lead to a fight, as it often has before. "Why do you think you're feeling like that?" He asked. "I don't know, I just am," I thought at first. But him asking prompted me to think about it a little further.
Was it really the I wasn't getting enough done? I mean, what was so wrong with taking the day off of my to-do list? All I could hear were the thoughts telling me I need to do this and I need to do that, but if I would have really listened to what I needed to do to feel my best, instead of all the things I felt pressure to get done, I probably would have realized it was a perfectly good opportunity for me to just relax and be where I wanted to be: comfortable on the couch with my cute husband.

As adults we sure have a lot of responsibilities, pressures, and reasons to stress. Honestly I wish life would prepare us more for all that comes with being an adult (Spoiler: it's not always that fun!). But it's how we decide to let those potential pressures impact us that makes the difference. Sure, there are always going to be pressures that are unavoidable and out of our control. There's the pressure, or more of a requirement really, to pay your bills and put food on the table. There's pressure to do the right thing and to make the right decisions;  and there may be pressure to live up to expectations of others or to keep up with the rest of your world. But the point I think I'm trying to make is we shouldn't let those pressures persuade us from doing what we really want/need to do to be happy. Especially if there are ones you're putting on yourself that you can let go of. Don't be so hard on yourself. Spend that quality time with those around you if you can.
After I made peace with all I didn't accomplish yesterday, I was able to focus on what I could do with a new day. Which brought me here to write, where I had wanted to be in the first place.
If your life or something in it doesn't feel right or if it's bothering you or giving you that unsettling, even irritating feeling, take that as a sign to investigate what you're really feeling that way about--whatever "it" is. I know often times its not that simple to say "no" to someone or  admit we aren't happy or take a leap and make a change. But often the more difficult or less obvious ways are the most rewarding. You've got to do what's best for you. Take care of you, first. And then when you're taking the best care of you, you can tackle all those items/goals/to-do's on your list. That's the lesson I'd like to learn today and every other day for that matter. It's one I always have trouble applying day in and day out. But I'm going to keep striving to get better and some day if I continue to work towards it, I will be.

Can you relate to feeling pressure in your every day life? How do you cope with the pressures you experience? Let me know with a comment below :)

To me this photo is a reminder to stop, take a deep breath and relax.  Imagine how relaxed you'd feel if that was your current view. Close your eyes, breathe and let go of the pressure that could be weighing you down in this moment.



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