Thursday, May 14, 2020

Instagram vs. Reality...Postpartum Edition

Instagram vs. reality, here we go. 

It's not unusual to look at social media posts of other mom/families and think to yourself:
-"They make it look so easy" or
-"What a perfect family, why isn't mine like that?" or
-"Why aren't I as good at parenting as they are?"
I think it's actually pretty much become a norm these days to think some of those things when scrolling through social feeds. All of those feelings are legitimate! Some people make parenting look easy...or their lives in general look pretty perfect. And good for them if life is that grand, but I don't want to be one of those people portraying that my life  "is perfectly good and fine" if indeed it is not. I'm here to assure you I'm nowhere near perfect or doing this whole parenting thing “easily”! It takes a village, let me tell you. And this time around, the postpartum period (or 4th trimester as it’s also called) has been extra tough for me. So I hope the photos I posted are some representation of real life ... real motherhood. Dark circles, milk stains and all. Because like I said, this journey has been a bumpy one. Even with having a great support system around me of my husband, family and fellow mama friends.

Let me also disclaim that I am not posting this for sympathy and there is no need to be concerned. I am taking proper measures to get the help and care I need and I will be okay, I have faith in that. 
I am posting this because I want other women who feel like I do to know that it’s okay.  It’s okay to not be “okay”all the time. It’s okay to feel completely and utterly defeated at times.
The first week of Max’s life was probably the hardest of my life in terms of the mental, physical, emotional toll it took on my body.  I just about hit rock bottom on at least one occasion, having a slightly scary mental breakdown. And the guilt I feel for even saying that is real, too. Because I do feel sometimes that I should only be thankful for having brought a healthy baby boy into this world. I am thankful, but if I’m being transparent it’s not all I feel. I also feel exhausted, overwhelmed, and mood swings that have me feeling all over the place emotionally and straight up a mess at times. 
Then there’s the good moments though, where my heart is so full and I feel so much love for Max and Carmella that I’m instantly reminded why I love being a mom and why I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I guess my point is that I feel all of these things. And that’s okay. My body went through some major changes over the last 9 months and it's going to take some time for it to adjust back. I shouldn’t be expected to be back to “normal” right after having a baby. And either should you... if you’re reading this and can relate to anything I said. Let this be a reminder to go easy on yourself!! Being a parent is the hardest most thankless job in the world (in my opinion at least) and we can only do the best we can! We can’t be perfect. So we shouldn’t aim to be. As long as you’re giving your child/children the unconditional love you feel inside, or trying your best to, you’re doing A-okay. Heck. Even better than that. You’re doing the dang thing really well! 👏👏👏and we all deserve a round of applause for that! Especially during a global pandemic! So BRAVO parents, BRAVO! Keep doing what you're doing...because you're pretty darn amazing if you ask me.

No comments:

Post a Comment